Well anyways you all know that this year's been pretty craptasic for me, and I really thought things would get better. I was getting ready to go to uni in 2010, dad was recovering from his stroke, mum said she’d get off her arse and work since there’s no way dad can anymore and my brother was thinking about redoing TEE so he could go to uni …

Well everything’s FUCKED yes.. I’m swearing and that almost never happens. I don’t think I can go to uni now because there is no way I can pay for it. I have too move out NOW. Thanks to my kind loving family, deciding that the best thing to was to hand all their problems over to me.. Yeah I know that sounds odd.

I can’t work 50hours >.< and take care of them which includes cooking, cleaning for 5 people and grocery shopping.. and I have to do all this while trying to organize my own life. This is the first time I’ve stood up for myself and decided to look out for me. Which probably sounds terrible, but I’ve already given up my education once to help them (when dad was in hospital) i’m starting to lose my mind.

I really don’t need to wake up every morning feeling depressed and wonder why do I even bother dealing with people that don’t seem to want to help themselves.. like my mother who refuses to work instead she’d rather go out and come home to complain about how her life is hard because her friends want to go to avon parties and she has to drive my dad to stroke rehab once a week.

Any way my parents have never cared about my education. The only person that seemed to take an interest in my education was my older brother, who thinks I really need to move out. He left over 5 years ago and I rarely speak to him because he lives over east. My other brother (the one that wants to go to uni) isn’t too sure what to do. If I move out then I’m leaving him with our vindictive mother and there’s a high chance he’ll just give up on everything and he could do anything if he put his mind to it...just our mother likes to put people down. I need a new job that's full time and if the pays ok i can try to save up for uni.

Soo i still have a goal...

If anyone knows where a can get an ok paying job PLZ TELL ME!.

I hope your day is alot better than mine... hmmm i guess i still have something to look forward to. I'M TOTALLY STALKING YOU GEORGIA!!! Before you knee is cut up ...and served...to pandas.

kitty